Prayers and Procrastination

(Or: The only thing missing was a Migraine)

Exams are strange times, aren’t they? My second year summer ones are rapidly fading into the distance after just a couple of weeks of freedom.

I found that all kinds of studying repelled me. No matter what setting I was in or all the distractions I removed, I still found myself staring out the window or into space, or even thinking of other things while I was taking notes (!!) so nothing would go into my brain.

I was out of my routine of classes and in some cases, going home for the weekend, so Belfast had a different feel to it. The house and street were quiet and odd. On the Saturday night that I spent up there, I went to the local Mass and not being used to the system, skipped some old people (accidentally!) in the queue for Communion which I got some pretty dirty looks about. On the way home I got some food from the little Chinese on our street and it was amazing. I watched Britain’s Got Talent with my housemate. See how much work we did? Because I was missing my friend’s fancy dress birthday party in Derry, and thus my boyfriend wearing green tights, I made her a sign and forced myself to do a few hours of reading to try to make it worthwhile…

I was introduced to the idea of ’emergency chocolate’ by Abbye, I had always known of its existence but just hadn’t formed a thought about it…I also had latte with her and chatted for about 3 hours.

I made one dinner that I loved and was proud of. It consisted of a red onion, a yellow pepper, some cooked chicken pieces, noodles and stir fry sauce. It was yum. I can’t cook! A regret of mine…

A study picnic of sorts...

The Queen’s visit, Obama’s visit and a few weddings of people I used to know were all in my periphery as I attempted to complete my essays and my revision of philosophy of mind. Weddings of friends and acquaintances have begun…makes me feel like I am on the cusp of something… Surely we are not old enough for this? I turned 22 at the weekend, I’m even a little in denial about that.

Pure procrastination allowed me to notice things I hadn’t before, like the pretty, sporty medical students that live opposite and at a different house a poor girl who only had to do the walk of shame (at 12 noon on a Tuesday) in heels from his front door to the road and waiting taxi and managed to fall out the door in a heap – through alcohol or pure embarrassment.

I said a lot of prayers, mainly to St Joseph of Cupertino ‘patron saint of test takers and weak students.’

I developed a weird dress sense as I wasn’t often leaving the house. I must find the photo but one day I found myself in flowery leggings, my NaNoWriMo t-shirt and a pink cardigan. Personal appearance goes out the window. Exam face, anyone?

Stress or hormones or perhaps both had me crying at the drop of a hat. I cried when I saw Foo Fighters perform ‘Walk’ on TV at Radio One’s Big Weekend “They’re going to play this when Dave Grohl dies…” I cried when I watched ‘When Harry Met Sally’ for the first time (I Loved it!) I cried at Joanna Cannon’s blog – and also Keris’ Post about turning 40.

A few days before the exam I had to get my boyfriend to change my Twitter and Facebook passwords so that I wouldn’t drift onto these sites.

I had other things going on in my life, but I think I could have definitely tried harder! Next year I am promising myself that I will work very hard, as the final year of my degree carries the most marks. Strange times, exams. Let’s hope the results are kind…

Author: Fiona @ lifelyricslemoncake

6 thoughts on “Prayers and Procrastination”

  1. Oh well done for getting through. I still occasionally have anxiety dreams about exams and I graduated 10 years ago! And I’m so glad you loved When Harry Met Sally – it’s my favourite film. 🙂

    1. Thank you Keris ! I have more anxiety dreams about my part time job (full time over the summer!). Yeah, it was you who put it in my head to watch it. It really sparks the can women-and-men-be-friends question. I want to say they can but I’m not so sure anymore 🙂

  2. I’ve been on at gareth for the past week that i want to watch it, as ive never watched the full thing!! I also want to watch Jerry Maguire for the “you had me at hello” line!

  3. Proof that emergency chocolate is not only for exams-I’m eating mine right now!
    I leave tomorrow for the super exciting euro-trip…however, when I get back, I’ll be 21 😦
    I feel pretty weird about it, like I go away and when I come back I’m a whole year older??????
    I know it’s not quite like that…but it did cause a rush to the stash of emergency chocolate.

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